Post #3

Okay, I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve been kind of terrible at this blog thing. I knew I was going to be terrible at it and I decided to make a site anyway. The things is, I’m not the best with sustainable action. If you need something finished in a burst of energy, I’m your girl! If you need something worked on every day for a month, don’t ask me. I’ll familiarize myself with the task enough to take a guess at how long it will take me and then wait until that amount of time before its due to start. It results in a lot of missed deadlines.

And yet, here I am again with a new determination to write a post at least once a week. I’m trying to come up with ways to make it easier on myself, but we can also just say that this is a social experiment to see how long these posts last.

It’s 10:10 a.m. (make a wish!) on Monday, March 2nd, 2020. I’m listening to Break My Heart by Valentina. My current book is When The Moon Was Ours by Anna-Marie McLemore. I’m sitting in the English office at a high school during the planning period of the teacher I’m substituting for. I already wish this day was over and I could go home and relax in bed.

Honestly, as a general rule, being a substitute teacher is pretty easy. I mostly just sit in the classroom while the students complete the work assigned to them. I like high school jobs the best because usually the students’ age and self-sufficiency means I hardly have to talk to them. When I tell people I’m a substitute, they’re always surprised that I prefer high school because I look so young. I’m probably never going to post pictures, but I will say that I’m 24 and most people assume I’m 16. It doesn’t help that I dress pretty casually and rarely wear makeup. Then again, I don’t mind looking young that much. There’s very little I need to look old for.

Some people think substituting is one of those things, but children can tell who’s serious and who’s not and will act accordingly. I’m very serious about the type of behavior I expect, and I’m not tested often.

I feel like this blog is going to be interesting. I’m trying not to polish it too much because I want it to depict my life and my personality accurately, but I’m also worried about how I come off, how people will perceive me through what I’ve written about myself. What others think of me is something that concerns me deeply when I remember to consider it. I am trying to get better at doing my own thing, but it’s difficult because I don’t like being by myself in new situations. I would say I get anxious, but I feel like that’s a serious word and I don’t know if it applies to me.

This has accidentally gotten a bit long, so I’m going to end it here. Hopefully, I’ll be back next week with another post. I wonder how long it’ll be before anyone pays attention to these.

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